Targets for 2020 - NOT Resolutions

So in my #Search4Sagacity, at age 51.5 years, I have decided that rather than making New Year's Resolutions, I'm going to "target" working on important ways to improve myself so that I am stronger and happier, as well as to better serve others.

I came up with "Target" so that it started with "T" like "Twenty-Twenty" and I thought about 20 Targets so it would be a play on the year "2020". I gave this quite a bit of thought and came up with four main areas of my life where I could focus and then decided upon 5 "targets" in each of these areas to work on this year (so that it would add up to 20 -- see pretty smart, eh?).

These *ARE* in priority order from 1 to 20 (EXCEPT for #12 and #13 are really tied but listed in age order! LOL - I can't prioritize one kid over the other!?!?)

I am making a really conscious effort to take care of myself FIRST (which I rarely have done in the past 51 years) before I can be of any help/use to others. I think having it in priority order will also be useful when I am making decisions about what I should try to accomplish and when things seem "pressing" or "urgent", I can evaluate what to do according to the priority list.

Below is the visual I am starting with, but as the year progresses I think I might want to turn this into something more like a Venn Diagram or a flow chart or circular chart to show the inter-relatedness of all these things. For now, I think this "linear" order is useful for how my brain wants to "TackleTheTargets" ...

...that may be my new hashtag this year #TackleTheTargets...ah, I like that!! I'm so glad that I am good at entertaining myself. LOL

Challenge - make it another 30 years

So Can I MAKE it to 81?

My maternal grandmother made it to 92....she was my oldest (BY direct BLOOD) to make it this far.  I FREAKING WISH I KNEW HER LONGEVITY SECRET!!!  (SERIOUSLY MEAN & CATTY), but I think it was "Not giving a flying F about anyone but herself....definition of "BITCH", but seems untoward to say that about your dead grandma...

SO ANYWAYS...if anyone even gives a darn and has read this and wants to tell me they read it and are:
A. ok w me 
B. pissed off at me 
C. unsure of me 
D. ALL OF THE ABOVE or 
E. Could care less

....now that I am 51, I am seriously re-thinking my reckless behavior and lifestyle....

My MIL (Mother In Law) is 82 and as capable as capable can be....pretty much out-pacing some of my 50-ish contemporaries!!!

So tomorrow, I am going to start my healthy lifestyle regimen and stick to it at least for 5 weeks....I figure, I can do ANY-Fn-THING for 30 days.

Simply put, I will *ONLY* consume fruit, veggies and meat.

THE END.
Later -- Taters

Before pix:

Post # 50: 50LessonsFr50Yrs - last post til i have a birthday

ANOTHER BASIC LESSON...but then I AM DONE with my personal challenge to provide #50LessonsFr50YRS!

here it is: Post# 50: 

NOBODY IS AWAKE AT 1:20 AM 

when you think you have some really AweSOMe social media post...

THE END

Post #49: #50LessonsFr50YRS: don't get disorganized

Only 4 more days til the end of my 51st year...and MY DEADLINE for this #50LessonsFr50YRS project...

I have TWO MORE TO GO....

problem is...i had some good ideas saved up, but I am so very disorganized and discombobulated by my new living and working situation, that I cannot find those ideas.

So here's a lazy lesson:

DO NOT LET LIFE get DISORGANIZED and DISCOMBOBULATED.

48th Post: 50LessonsFr50Yrs: How to Lose Weight

Lesson #48: How to Lose Weight

There are a BAZILLION experts on this subject, but from my perspective, it's really SUPER SIMPLE:

EAT LESS, MOVE MORE

These four words contain the only formula that I know (at least for my body) that ACTUALLY WORKS!

I *KNOW* it, but it's much harder ACTUALLY DOING IT or motivating myself to STICK TO IT! I will follow the formula for about a week, see some progress and then SLACK OFF....WHAT IS WRONG with ME??

Here's evidence that it works (see my blog from 10 years ago when I lost 20 POUNDS), and while I was 40 at the time and my body is probably even more obstinate ten years later, I know this is WHAT I MUST DO...JUST need to DIG WAY DEEP DOWN and DO IT!!

Here are a few pins from my "Living Healthy" Pinterest board - i really should re-visit these more often!!

47th Post: 50LessonsFr50Yrs: Don't forget Your Ears

Lesson #47: Don't forget to put sunscreen on your ears!

Simple, but VERY IMPORTANT lesson...when your ears get sunburned it really REALLY hurts...not that sunburn on other parts of your body don't hurt, but many people forget this.

I grew up going to the pool and beach and we used BABY OIL to "deepen" our tans!  I had my fair share of HORRIBLE sunburns in my teens and now I will probably pay for it dearly.  (but I'm kind of scared to go to the dermatologist).

Most young people today are raised to understand the dangers of too much sun exposure. THANK GOODNESS!

46th Post: 50LessonsFr50Yrs: Pick Your Battles (Audra)

Lesson #46: Pick Your Battles Wisely


One of the advantages of having a best friend who is smart, kind, laid-back and majored in Psychology, is that she has attempted for nearly 30 years to teach me not to get all upset about EVERY LITTLE THING! She is always trying to teach me that everything is NOT a battle and you need to be very careful about which battles I should truly care about and engage.

I still struggle with this lesson, but I always hear Audra's voice calmly trying to calm me down.

I get too upset over so many issues in this world (gun violence, suicide, the disgustingly dumb President, bullying, mean girls, low priorities for education and people at risk, the environment, etc, etc). I have to remember that I cannot fix it all and concentrate on what I CAN fix. And to not allow myself to stress-out and make myself sad and ill.

45th Post: 50Lessonsfr50Years: not relevant

My #45th lesson is: If you try to understand other people's drama as "normal" then you are wasting your time. AND STOP judging people when you don't FUCKING know what is really happening in their lives!!!

Most people think their drama is soooooooooooo FREAKING MAJOR...


....but if they really knew and understood the depth of what OTHER PEOPLE have to ACTULLY LIVE THROUGH (but they don't let you know b/c they want to spare the world of their burden and ACTUALLY have some CLASS), then they would be so EMBARRASSED!!

GET OVER YOURSELVES -- NOW!! 

The world is NOT REVOLVING AROUND YOU!

44th Post: 50Lessonsfr50YRS - not enough

Lesson #44: can't do it all

Yep, you Can NOT do it all. You will never satisfy everyone and even when you try, people (even those closest to you) will not appreciate your effort.

can't say much else or i may offend someone 

43rd Post: 50Lessonsfr50YRS: Ute Prayer Trees

So I thought I had posted about this on the blog, but it was only on FB....

Lesson #43:  Ute Prayer Trees are beautiful cultivated trees that I have found around my neighborhood that I just discovered the meaning of in March 2017.

Here's what I said on FB:

"MIND BLOWN: I've noticed the trees on my neighborhood hike these past 3 years were interesting, but now I learned today about the Ute Indian Prayer Trees at Fox Run Regional Park"

Then I went out to take a bunch of pictures and posted a great little video by someone who has studied and explained the origin of these trees in Fox Run Park near us: https://youtu.be/3LkYQbcnlkE

42nd Post: 50Lessonsfr50YRS: Jealous of Academics

ACK - I HAVE 50 DAYS til my deadline to post 50 Lessons I've Learned in 50 Years BEFORE I TURN 51 on June 24th!!

So here's a short one, that I may come back to later (but I promised myself that I am going to exercise 30 minutes EVERY DAY til I leave for camp in about 5 weeks....and my window on today is closing as I have other things to tend to):

Lesson #42: I've learned that I am JEALOUS, LIKE REALLY REALLY JEALOUS of people whose career path basically means they get to read, research, ponder, learn and write about very interesting topics. 

I review the CV's (curriculum vitae) of university professors and I think:

"WOW, how do they have time to write all that great stuff?!?!?"

I only have time to ZIP off simple shit like this blog entry. Not researched, just junk from my head.

What sparked this today? This great article I read in Harpers by Fred Turner (Harry and Norman Chandler Professor of Communication at Stanford University) from January (magazine was sitting on my shelf for months...): 

Machine Politics: The rise of the internet and a new age of authoritarianism

Fav Quote from article: Computer-supported interconnection is simply no substitute for face-to-face negotiation, long-term collaboration, and the hard work of living together."

More later on this later...maybe...!?!?

EIGHT MORE LESSONS TO GO....

41st Post: 50Lessonsfr50YRS: "I will do ANYTHING for you" is BULLSHIT

lesson #41: MOST ppl really don't give a darn about anyone else, but themselves and their STUPID OFFERS to call them b/c "they would do "ANYTHING" you need, just name it" is HORSESHIT!!!!

So this is pretty dark and negative on my part, but I have learned that there are about 1-2 PERCENT of all the people I know you who ACTUALLY, *REALLY* FREAKING CARE about me and want to know me through and through -- LIKE REALLY KNOW me and willing to listen and live through the good, the bad, the ugly WITH ME.

Generally, people don't want to deal with other people's feelings b/c they can't even take/understand their OWN feelings.

I can count on ONE hand the people who I can rely upon to listen, show an interest, and ask follow up questions (about stuff that I may have brought up a while ago, but may still be important to me, but they are responsive enough and *CARE* enough to ask) and are willing to stick with me NO MATTER FUCKING WHAT...

These people are a TRUE blessing....

....and the others who say they care and say SHIT like "I will do anything for you, just tell me" --- as for them, I become REALLY GET PISSED OFF when I call to redeem that "ANYTHING coupon", and they say "Well, I can't do that right now b/c blaah blah blah ... fill in the blah" BECAUSE I KNOW it really means 'NOT THAT thing..but what else?' OR what REALLY REALLY PISSES ME OFF is they OFFER some dumb other solution that is CONVENIENT FOR THEM, but NOT  helpful or even CLOSE to what I NEEDED!  (but, of course, was all they were willing to do or could do)

Apparently what is happening in their life takes precedence over what they originally promised in that FALSE, STUPID "Anything you need" statement earlier that made THEM feel GOOD and IMPORTANT! 

I JUST WANT TO YELL "PLEASE tell me what your initial DECLARATION previous of "ANYTHING" meant??????????????????????????"

#40 of 50Lessonsfr50YRS: How to Make Collins Pizza

Well this is really a CHEAT post, as it was posted several years ago, but since I am documenting some VERY IMPORTANT LIFE LESSONS

....and I still have NINE more to go after this one, I am going to cheat!

#40 of 50Lessonsfr50YRS: How to Make Collins Pizza

Go to this link: https://sheilasjumpinoff.blogspot.com/2009/06/pizza-inspired-by-dad-and-fk.html

SPECIAL THANKS to life-long friend, Kevin Garrison for making up these cool postcards when Dad died in 2009!  See flip side when you follow link above for the Pizza POST! 

#39 of 50Lessonsfr50YRS: HUMIDITY changes How You Operate-Pencil Protection Edition

This lesson isn't as deep as many of the others in this series...

Lesson #39: #50Lessons50Yrs:

"HUMIDITY changes how you operate."

So I grew up in the South and it was generally like living in a wet blanket...sometimes that blanket was even COLD!  I always felt pretty STICKY. I remember the first time I flew back to Memphis after living in Colorado Springs for about 6 months and walked through the sliding doors to the outside and INSTANTLY began to SWEAT. I thought, "MY GOD, how did I grow up in this?!?!"

Now that I have lived out West for a total of about 12 years (about a quarter of my life), I have experienced the OPPOSITE of HIGH Humidity...DRY AS BONES!

In this low humidity climate, I've had to adjust how I operate and here are a few sub-learnings from this:

A. ONE OF THE BEST PARTS of low humidity is that the "feel" of temperature isn't quite as stunning. For example, 40 degrees in Colorado is light jacket weather VS. being a winter coat weather back in Memphis or Atlanta.  Conversely, 90 degrees in Colorado is NOT miserable like in the South.

B. A couple of DOWNSIDES of Low Humidity:

• You have to drink more water, 
• You have to put lots of lotion on daily and 
• You have to PROTECT YOUR PENCIL ERASERS!

Now here's a good lesson to pass along to your children and teacher friends:

TIPS for PROTECTING your PENCIL ERASERS:

Once "exposed" to the air, you have about 1 month before it becomes hard as a rock and just smears your paper when you attempt to use it.

Keep them in the original package as long as possible.

Once "exposed", you need to protect your future ability to erase cleanly and efficiently, so JUST like safely skiing or riding your bike or any other activity that requires "PROTECTION", you need to buy HELMETS for your pencils.

Helmets are fairly hardy once exposed, but keep your extra helmets in an air-tight baggie.

11 MORE to go in my #50LessonsFr50YRS series...

Post #38 50LessonsFr50Yrs: Lots of "LIKES" don't hurt a thing

ANOTHER installment in my #50LessonsFR50Yrs called:

Lots of "LIKES" don't hurt a dadblast thing!

I am often "called out" for my activity on social media...I do "LIKE" a lot of peoples' posts, but my thinking about social media is that people are looking for attention or affirmation when they post stuff, so what harm is it for me to hit the "LIKE" button?

Of course, I don't "LIKE" some posts that are not aligned with my values, thoughts, and feelings...and on those, I TRY REALLY HARD to just IGNORE them...

However, when I do like or enjoy what you post, why not share little BOOST with that person that tells them "I SEE YOU, I HEAR YOU, I CARE about YOU"?

ONLY 12 MORE POSTS TO GO to hit my GOAL of 50 Lessons BEFORE I turn 51!!!

#37 Be Yourself Redux: 50LessonsFr50Years

OMG - I have THIRTEEN (13) MORE of these lessons to write in the next 74 DAYS before my 50th (really 51st year) ENDS>>>>> ACK!!

So here's my 37th lesson  - "Be Yourself Redux" because I'm pretty sure several of these #50LessonsFr50Years are this SAME LESSON in some form or fashion... 

(oh, sidenote - just thought of another lesson when i bolded that "Be Yourself..." part above...new post idea:

 "WHY do these interfaces offer text choices when the back-end can control that anyway!?!?---or MY LIMITED capabilities on Web publishing is HAUNTING ME since it's now PART OF MY F'ing JOB!")

Let me get back to the topic at hand....may be short and sweet....or could ramble a bit....

So this is the thing about this lesson today "Be Yourself Redux"....when you have a "meltdown" and start acting like others around you (who you LOVE, but you generally do not care for the way they act and feel uncomfortable telling them and know it will only upset them, so you keep it all inside) ...well IF THEY SEE YOU ACTING in a TERRIBLE WAY (that you DISLIKE IMMENSELY, but remember, this is the way they act on a daily, normal basis), THEN THEIR REACTION becomes something UNBeLIEVABLE like they tell YOU that you are being unreasonable or stupid or crazy...

...SOOOOOO basically when you have a brief change in being YOU (when you are having a stress-out moment that RARELY HAPPENS), and they are BASICALLY seeing you being LIKE THEM, they POUNCE ON YOU and it's just not worth letting them see you in your weakness...

so it's REALLY SHITTY time when you are having a bad day or bad moment when you are losing your SHIT and need support, but those who supposedly care about you (b/c you are ALWAYS F'n there for them, so why wouldn't they be there for you?)...well they DECIDE TO BE ALL F'n JUDGEMENTAL about your meltdown, yeah that's just some CRAZY SHIT! 

I'm just tired of it...and I HATE that I have to be REALLY SELECTIVE with who I am honest with anyone b/c many are not very understanding or empathetic or non-judgmental!! 

lol....maybe if anyone really cared and read my blog, they might have an actual REAL F'n conversation with me. 

I'm pretty F'n proud of my VERY VERY HIGH SELF-CONFIDENCE that will keep me afloat (at the moment I am pissed and drowning but the confidence is like a life jacket)! 

#36 Know Your Audience: 50LessonsFr50Years

just posted one, but another popped into my head:  (WAHOO - sidenote: 14 TO GO)

Lesson#36: KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE

So this is a basic Marketing principal to "KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE" so that you can craft a customized/personalized message that best suits who you are trying to "reach" or "influence" or to "buy" (your crap).

But it just seems COMMON SENSE TO ME that you should always KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE and be prepared to communicate with them in a way that is mutually beneficial so that you are both satisfied with the outcome of the conversation....or at least both have an ENJOYABLE EXPERIENCE!!

Sometimes you have to become the world's best actor to talk with the "audience" or someone you are with to better understand what's on your mind and to convince them to go along with you...

Sometimes you are in the company of "strangers" or people who don't know you and you have to "blend in", so you either remain silent or adapt to their "language" to "fit in"...(but if you read Lesson#35, you'd understand that after 50, this may be IMPOSSIBLE)!!

#35: 50LessonsFr50Yrs-Don't give a DAMN

I have told my two teenage children,OVER AND OVER again lately that the BEST thing about turning 50 is that I no longer care what anyone thinks!

I never really gave a flying F what others thought, but it has become CRYSTAL clear that it really  REALLY doesn't matter what others think and if I  worry about their "opinions", then I am only driving myself CRAZY.

I'm FREAKING FULL OF CONFIDENCE and LOVE myself so much (that I re-read my posts on FB to compliment myself on how clever I am)...that I don't give a DAMN about what anyone thinks...as long as I am being kind, good and not doing anything unethical or illegal, then I do NOT HAVE A DAMN THING to worry about -- ESPECIALLY SOME SORRY PERSON'S OPINIONS!

Lesson #34: 50LessonsFr50YRS: PACK lightly

I just came home from my first work trip to Chicago and was there for 5 days...I was so proud of myself that I packed a reasonably-sized suitcase with exactly 5 days worth of clothes without all the "extras" that I used to think I "NEEDED". I could navigate around the airport, the Ubers and the train station with ease b/c these bags were ON WHEELS, but also not so HUGE that my "imprint" doubled or tripled!


On my first "BIG" trip on my own, I went to Great Britain when I was about 25. I took A HUGE -- I MEAN HUGE suitcase and I WAS MISERABLE!! Especially if you plan on being a tourist and not staying in one particular hotel the whole time, trying to catch trains or get in and out of cabs in another country, it's such a PAIN to lug so much around.

Here's a RECENT (last summer in Florida) BAD packing example -- Chris's BIKE box didn't fit in our rental car!!

After 25 years, I think I have FINALLY learned to travel light. These past 3 years since Mom died and I had to go back & forth between Colorado & Georgia so much taught me the SAGACITY of traveling light.

It may seem a simple thing, but packing lightly has BIG ADVANTAGES:

1. I am not in physical pain (and it would be much worse nowadays that I am double the age I was when I first traveled solo).
2. I can confidently navigate around the people who take up WAY TOO MUCH space at airports or who wander around lost and think they are the only people in the world.
3. I don't have to fret over what to wear each day - there are limited choices!
4. I just feel more organized if i think it all through on the front end and say to myself, "If it doesn't fit in here, you don't need it."
5. I am not stressed about forgetting anything b/c there's always SHOPPING in the city I am traveling to. ;-)

Lesson #33: 50LessonsFr50YRS = Old Dogs *CAN* Learn New Tricks

Post #33: 50LessonsFr50YRS - I CAN LEARN NEW TRICK

I am brushing up and RE-learning some techniques for my new JOB at Clearwater Camp for Girls as their first full-time Development & Communications Director!  

So I took a 2 day seminar to re-learn eTapestry (the donor database they use and I used back about 6 years ago at Girls Inc of Memphis).

AND

I've been using the InterWEBS to brush up on graphic design today.  See these two things I made with the help of free online tool called Canva (I'm proud of my little self!).

Post #32: 50LessonsFr50YRS - Be Yourself

Lesson #32: Be Yourself

This *ACTUALLY* took me a REALLY REALLY long time to learn.

Of course, I did the teenage "trying out" things and the college "independence" thing. 

But I did NOT really stopped caring what others thought and stopped trying to be what was "expected" about 6 years ago when we decided to move back to Colorado in 2013. I managed to land my job at The Resource Exchange wearing a hideous purple blazer b/c i thought i needed something "professional" over my blouse for the interview and this was all I could find on short notice in the gift shop at The Antler's Hotel. They thought my experience, skills and accomplishments were worth "taking a gamble". The E.D.'s only hesitation (THAT HE ACTUALLY TOLD ME before making an offer) about hiring me was whether I would dress appropriately for various situations...LOL!!! 

So anyways, I stopped trying to kiss butts and play nice around 6 years ago and it has really made me less stressed and more happy -- (except i went back to "playing nice" for a bit this past couple of years b/c there were a few people i wasn't sure I could really trust with the real me, so I had to exercise my excellent acting skills...but I digress).

THEREFORE, dear readers, I implore you to please be yourself and you will experience a freedom way worth much more than trying to please others...that takes WAY TOO MUCH effort, and if they aren't willing to accept you, then they aren't worth wasting your time on....

 

Post #31 in 50LessonsFr50YRS: Blogging Supports My #Search4Sagacity

I was going to quit at 30 today, but then realized looking back that as of October 2018, I have been "blogging" for TEN YEARS!

SOoooo...Lesson #31 in my "50 Things I've Learned in 50 Years" series is:

I am glad "I JUMPED OFF THE BRIDGE" into blogger-land to help my ongoing journey in my #Search4Sagacity. After 10 years of blogging, I can look back at what i have shared as my "public journal" and review my core values, beliefs and mission AND I AM PROUD to say that these REMAIN INTACT (thanks Mom & Dad!!).

Here are few fun things about me, my mission, values & beliefs:

A. FIRST POST - over TEN YEARS AGO

B. Personal Improvement Plan in 1998 (after 20 years, this has remained in my planner. But TODAY, I removed it and will update it as I plan for my new adventures as a 50 year old):

Post #30 in 50Lessonsfr50YRS: Help One

#30 on my list of 50 Things I've Learned in 50 Years:

If I can leave a place or person better off for having been involved with them, then I have done well.

I think as a natural-born teacher, I want to be sure that I do MORE THAN the minimum of "do no harm" in my encounters with others. I truly want them to have learned something or become a little bit stronger, smarter, bolder than before they met me. That seems a bit self-aggrandizing, but i believe that is what I was put here on Earth to do....

...with Clearwater Camp for Girls, I truly believe in providing a great experience (socially, recreationally, emotionally, leadershiply, etc) is so very important for not only the future of our community, country and world, but so very important for THAT GIRL! 

I am excited to start my new professional adventure as CC4G's first full-time Development and Communications Director next week! ;-)

Post #29 in 50Lessonsfr50YRS: Positive Attitude

Up to Lesson #29 on 50 Things I've Learned in 50 Years = Positive Attitude will take you far and help you maintain happiness and lower stress.

I think this is a repeat, but worth repeating in a manner i am feeling it today -- PLUS i found this cute quote in one of my old organizers from many years ago when I worked at PPLD (1999-2003):