and
down....
...yeah, these past 2 years has been full of GOOD and BAD.
No cancer = GOOD
Losing several weeks of work = BAD -- still NOT feeling caught up and it's nearly 2 years since that surgery to remove 8 INCHES of my colon in Jan 2015!
Losing my Mom = BAD
Administering her estate = BAD
FINALLY getting the RIGHT team together at work = GOOD
Losing MONTHS AND MONTHS (really a FULL YEAR) of productivity due to WRoNG team at work = BAD
Getting Below Average Performance Review = BAD
Raising MORE $$ this Year = GOOD
Winning Assn of Fundraising Professionals Southern Colorado Fundraiser of the Year = GOOD
Studying and Passing the Certified Fund Raising Executive (CFRE) Exam = GOOD
GREAT (smart, kind, respectful, funny, talented) kids = GOOD
GREAT (caring, honest, hardworking, loving, good looking, etc.) husband = GOOD
Losing Chris's Dad = BAD
Mood Swings and Anxiety/Stress = BAD
Kathleen's Poor Health = BAD
Well it looks like the "GOODs" sort of out-number the "BADs"....so I guess i'm gonna be okay. Just hate not being able to control all this around me....but I guess I can control my reaction and not let things drag me soo far down!?!?
I'm just really TIRED of faking it....really want to escape for a while, but feel TRAPPED until I can settle my mom's estate and ensure that my siblings are healthy and happy....
Think I'll stop screaming (on the inside and at night when nobody can witness it) and try to enjoy the ride...Here is an actual ROLLERCOASTER in Denver that I rode with my cousin Cecelia and her buddy from D.C. this summer!
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